It was a hot August day in Bedford, Nova
Scotia. I was building a fort in my much cooler basement when the doorbell rang. I
leapt from my fort and ran to my front door. There stood my best friends Brooke,
and Renee, who also happened to be my neighbors. They were on the way to the
park with their babysitter and asked me to join. Excitedly I went downstairs to
grab my jump rope, which had been used in the construction my fort. The fort
was made of a blanket, my jump rope and an old chair.
Unfortunately there was a staple sticking
out of the chair where the fabric was supposed to be secured in place. I wasn’t
paying attention and my lanky leg brushed against the staple hard. It sliced
through my knee like a knife through a banana and a river of blood began to
flood my sock. I screamed so loud in agonizing pain my father rushed to see what was wrong and
picked me up like a distressed damsel. He took me to the bathroom to assess the
damage and to put pressure on my wound.
I sat on the counter with a washcloth over
my knee, looking down at my once beautiful white lace socks that now were almost
brown, darkened by my blood. The tears ran down my face faster than the blood down my leg but it no longer hurt, i was crying in fear. I could see the bone in my knee just barely sticking out like a sandbar in the middle of the ocean. My father told me I needed stitches, so he grabbed
my mother and off to the emergency room we went.
It was a long wait, and was the first time
I remember going to the hospital. After about two hours I got very bored like a
typical restless five year old. So, my father decided he would go home to get
my coloring books and crayons. Upon his return I went to meet him at the
emergency doors where I also saw my first arrest. There was a man running
across the parking lot being chased by two police officers. He was a larger
fellow and was unable to fit through the doors quick enough. I was laughing
because my father was signing the cops theme song “Bad boys, bad boys, what’cha gonna do when they
come for you?” (Bad Boys, Inner Circle)
After about six more hours of waiting and coloring, I
was finally able to see a doctor. He gave me 13 stitches in my right knee and I
was good to go. Before I left I said to my mother, “I should have brought my
blue pants and he could have stitched them too”. I was referring to the pants
my cat had shredded with her claws. My mother snickered and we left.
The following week I don’t remember much about, however I do remember starting grade primary. I was not able to bend my knee so
went to school a few days early to explain my situation to my teacher. I walked
funny with my stiff leg, unable to bend in fear of ripping my stitches but none of the kids seemed to notice. The only time I
got asked what was wrong was when we had to sit on the floor campfire style for
story time. I either had to sit at the back with my legs straight out, or in a
chair with my leg elevated.
Either way, it was not how I would have
liked to have started of my educational journey, but at least I’ll never forget
it.
Hello Adrienne,
ReplyDeleteGreat memory! It brought back many memories for me at the IWK waiting hours to see a doctor. I hope they came around and gave you a Popsicle. I remember they used to do that.
I found the last sentence you wrote really finished the piece off well. It made me chuckle when you said educational experience. Very good writing!
My advice would be to describe your thoughts and feelings at the time more in depth. Was your knee in pain? Did you calm down after your dad came to the rescue? What happened to your friends?
It would be great to read more about exactly what was going through your mind when this traumatic experience happened. Other than that advice I really enjoyed the writing and flow of this piece.
Keep up the good work!
Kind regards,
Michelle Braden
Hi Adrienne,
ReplyDeleteGreat piece! I loved how “first time” ties not only to the first time you remember being in the hospital, but the first time you saw someone arrested and your first day of school. There are a lot of elements to this story. You have a vivid memory!
Through your descriptions the reader can get a good feel of the personality of your dad. He is strong from picking you up, considerate while getting your crayons, and has a good sense of humour. With this, I think the description of your mother almost competes with the character we have from your father and the story may be stronger if the focus was on only one of them.
With the story ending with the focus on your educational journey, I would have liked to see more about school. What was it like to meet your teacher for the first time? What was her reaction to your injury? Do you remember your first story time book?
I hope my comments are helpful and that you are enjoying your time in Edmonton this week!
Tanis